How young is too young?

I’ve had a two or three emails lately from parents looking for private singing lessons for a 5 or 6 year old. The child loves to sing and would like to get better at it. In America, when we think about getting better at something, we think about taking lessons, getting a tutor, hiring an expert, bringing in a consultant. 

That’s not a wholly bad strategy, and private lessons are rarely the best idea for a 5 to 10-year-old.

We mostly get better at singing by singing with people who are good at singing. We pick up on their good habits, we imitate their sound, we find new and more comfortable ways to hold ourselves, we learn by imitation. This is easier when the people we’re imitating already sort of sound like we do, and nobody sounds like elementary school kids, except elementary school kids. 

We also get better at singing when it’s a relationship-building activity, when we’re with people we already sort of understand and/or like. We can relax and have fun. We can hear that it matters that we’re there. We can feel at home in community. Singing is so much easier when we’re happy to be right here, now.

Would that every family could sing together in a way that felt good! And thank goodness for children’s choruses. With caring and competent direction, kids can learn to sing well, and become amazing musicians, well before middle school. 

None of this is to say that lessons for young kids are never a good idea, after all, I teach them. When to try private lessons for a young child is a good question, to be answered soon! 

Oh, What a Beautiful Morning

Most of the time when I drive into San Francisco to the VA Hospital, I take the "long" way – over the Richmond-San Rafael and then the Golden Gate Bridge – because it is so beautiful. Whether in fog, rain, or sun, this path across this bit of Earth is absolutely stunning. It's worth paying two tolls. It's also about 20 minutes faster than taking the Bay Bridge and then bushwhacking my way to the Pacific, and I'm usually late leaving home.

In early 2009, I started a chorus for residents of the VA's Community Living Center at Ft. Miley. The singers range in age from 60 to their mid-90s. Most are in wheelchairs. Twice a month we sing together songs we have known for a long time, performing about four times a year for other veterans and their families. We start each rehearsal with, "Oh, What A Beautiful Morning" and very quickly, if it wasn't already, it is a beautiful morning for just about everybody.

We’re preparing a 4th of July program right now – mostly patriotic songs, and “When I Fall in Love” and “Somewhere Over the Rainbow.” These have never sounded so good to me. Robust, and full, heartfelt and true.

Singing certainly does a body good. It lowers our blood pressure, increases our lung capacity, relaxes and engages the mind, strengthens the connections among us. And, this CLC Chorus reminds other people that joy is possible. When we carol in the clinic lobby in December, people stop in their tracks, and tear up, and say “Thank you for singing for me. It is so beautiful.” The Chorus’ singing is as much a public service as it is good exercise, and they are so proud to be doing it. 

Oh, what a beautiful morning! I've got a wonderful feeling everything's going our way.

What's on your Sing List?

Healing, Helpful Singing for Caregivers is off to a wonderful start, and I wanted to make some of the homework public for those who couldn’t participate this time around.

This week, search your heart for the songs that are full of love and healing for you. Maybe these were songs that were sung to you as a child. Maybe one is a chant you learned on a yoga retreat. Maybe there’s a song that just poured out of you at a time of unbearable grief, or inspired joy.

This is your Sing List: a list of songs that have healed, held or helped you, and that came to you from another person. These are songs that call you to your best, or calmest, or most loving self. These are songs that restore your soul.

Playlists are great, and this is not a playlist.

Take a deep breath.

What’s on your Sing List?

Have you sung from it lately?